Moving Day

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The Van Arrives at 11 am

Meanwhile, since I don't yet know if we'll have immediate connectivity from our rented house, I want to blog once more from the hotel, to be safe:

Desire is on my mind -- from the parody (I expect) of Silky Kumar's "Scent of Desire," which I've seen a couple of times on MTV here to Maximo's poignant crush in "The Blossoming of Maximo Oliveros" and the lifelong gender-dream of the "Beautiful Boxer."

Pat and I saw these two films yesterday at the "Films of Desire" festival with our friend who's on assignment here and his friend, who's originally from a small town near Kolkatta, but who works and lives in Bangalore now.

Post-film Desires on My Mind

And then I'm thinking about my own desires. There was a point in "Beautiful Boxer," where the main character was winded, running up an endless set of temple steps. The coach told the boxer, "Think of how the thing you wish for most is at the top of those steps and run to it."

I don't have a single-minded desire like the boxer, to be acknowledged as female -- well, sometimes, I wish to be acknowledged as female(!) -- but I mean that there's not one, over-riding wish...well, yes, there is: to feel universally understandable and understanding, even if my particular circumstances differ from others'.

Had I written "...to feel universally understanding and understandable," I'd have been disingenuous because the reality is that my first impulse is to want to be understood and then my attention can turn to understanding others...and I don't think I'm alone; in fact, that impulse is likely the genesis of most wars, i.e., I come first and then you matter.

We drove by three feral dogs last night and I said to Pat, "Do you think they're friends?"

"Probably."

I thought, but didn't say, "Do you think they're still friends when there's just one scrap of food available?"

On the way to the restaurant, I was telling our assignee-friend about the exciting experience of Friday night, of having witnessed the Muslim wedding, and how Pat's and my delight reminded me that all of us are universally connected, when we notice.

"Religion's just a good excuse for war," he said, "I'm convinced that it's not about religion, but always about resources."

Love, Money, Identity

Last night, both films showcased identity, love and overcoming poverty. On Friday, at lunch, I told my Indian friend that this weekend I needed to blog about money.

This was in response to her asking, "What have you noticed about India so far?"

"There are marvels all around us, everyday, just commuting back and forth. Wondrous humanity all around...and I am such a 'Have,' like I've never before been in my life -- Pat and I would have never been able to stay at a five-star hotel for multiple nights had our company not funded it -- and there are 'Have Nots' all around us."

I'm even more [self-]conscious about what we have as we prepare to move to the gated community today. And I cannot pretend that our privilege is brand new. We live nicely in New Jersey, too.

It's the visible contrast between what we have and what others don't that is so stark...though we did have a taste of feeling like "Have Nots" ourselves here twice so far -- during a play staged by the hotel, where we were surrounded by the Bangalore equivalent of the people who appear in photos of society events in the "Sunday Style" section of "The New York Times" every week, and when we glimpsed the wedding on Friday night. What sort of wealth would families have to be able to fly 70+ people from Edmonton, Canada and Bahrain to Bangalore?

This, I'm sure, is just one entry on topics I'll need to return to -- desire and privilege. Now, though, we need to eat breakfast, check out and move to our new home.