The postings on this site are my own and don’t necessarily represent IBM’s positions, strategies or opinions.
...Is My Friend Gail's Birthday
That's how I like to think of September 11th, but I can't help thinking of it in more macabre terms, being far from where we typically live -- about 12 miles away from Manhattan. Pat told me that she saw on TV that it's raining in New York City today.
"Good," I said, "that it's not a picture-perfect day, like it was six years ago."
Pat continued, "During the news, they interviewed some Americans, who were saying, 'People from other countries just don't understand how difficult this day is for us,' and I thought, 'No, they're thinking, now you know how we feel -- we, who've had terrorism in our countries for years.'"
At work earlier, I thought: Yes, I'll tell my whole story, if anyone asks, "Were you in New York City on September 11th?" In fact, I was working there that day, but at the IBM building at 57th and Madison Ave., rather than downtown; yet, I tasted a bit of the day's nightmare.
No one asked. No one even seemed even to notice the date. I guess Pat had a point! Or maybe they were being polite and not bringing it up?
Survivor's Rut
I remember when our neighbor fell through a glass door and cut his face this past Spring. When I saw him, I did not ask him to recount how it happened, as I knew that he'd have to re-live it in order to narrate it. That seemed too cruel. My insight came because I had that re-living sensation after a car accident during an ice storm this past April; so many concerned people asked me to detail it for them. I could have gotten past it more quickly, if I hadn't had to keep narrating it.
Same thing with September 11th. If anyone in India had asked for my story, I'd have offered it, but it would have taken a toll.
And I think of a colleague here, who's also on assignment for another company, for whom that bridge in Minnesota that fell several weeks ago was part of her daily commute; if she hadn't been here, and had been on that bridge instead that day....
Life is Good While It Lasts
Leaving dinner at the clubhouse tonight with Pat, I thought about a different loss that we transformed into opportunities for other adventures. More than the anniversary of September 11th, by dessert, I was thinking about it being the four-year anniversary of my deciding to stop trying to become pregnant; by the time I was 38, I had tried IUI via an anonymous donor nine times over 1.5 years.
God had other plans. Finally, on Rosh Hashanah four years ago, I faced that I wanted to stop trying. If we had had a child, I do not believe we'd have had the wherewithal for me to take this assignment, and for Pat to accompany me.
Speaking of Rosh Hashanah, it's time to pack for our trip tomorrow.
Please God, let 5768 be a year of good health for our loved ones and us. Amen.
Showing posts with label 5768. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 5768. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Saturday, September 8, 2007
Anticipating the New Year
The postings on this site are my own and don’t necessarily represent IBM’s positions, strategies or opinions.
Rosh Hashanah (the Jewish New Year) is Practically Here
This weekend, Pat and I walked barefoot through the Bull Temple and allowed a priest in front of the bull to rub red-powder bindis on our foreheads.
How did this Hindu ritual prepare us for Rosh Hashanah? Until just now, writing here, I hadn't considered a connection. Partaking of any religious ritual, as we did for a few minutes yesterday, seemed better than continuing with no religious community, as we had done for the past two months.
The priest had a plate that held money, which was reminiscent of plate-passing I've witnessed when attending church services with Christian friends. I had US$1 in my pocket and put it on the plate. I was saving the dollar to give to someone poor, which had been my instructions by the person who gave it to me prior to our departure from the States.
The dollar contributor was a past student-intern at our synagogue, who had since become a rabbi. I want to believe that the Temple was not a rich enterprise and that I fulfilled my assignment acceptably.
It's neat how the dollar was in the wallet of a New York City-based rabbi and made its way to the collection-plate of a Hindu priest in Bangalore.
Temples on Land and in My Imagination
The only other major temple near Bangalore is the ISKON Temple. Hare Krishnas, who run it, do proselytize, which is not typical of most Hindus, according to my nephew Zach.
I just looked at the web tour of the ISKON Temple (see link above) and it looks as grand as I imagine the ancient Temple in Jerusalem looked in its day. A number of worshippers need temples, mosques, synagogues and churches. Apparently.
Until planning our upcoming trip to Kochi, Pat and I have been mostly religiously structureless while in India. Yesterday's tour of the Bull Temple and the temple in tribute to Ganesh down the hill from it, and the Muslim wedding we happened on last month, were as close as we've been to spending spiritual time together in community.
Where is God?
My friend Zdravko asked me for my concept of God several months ago and I told him that it aligned with Martin Buber's I-Thou idea, that in our best encounters with other human beings, we see the Divine in each other and are paying full attention to each other, are fully present.
I want to hang onto this concept, particularly while we're not somewhere, where it's simple to pray with other Jews in community. Most of all, this six-month experience of living far from my birthplace is stretching me to try to have I-Thou experiences with people who are not necessarily natively familiar to me.
What Will the New Year Bring?
Every Jewish New Year, I have a parallel sense of hope and dread, as every single year in my experience, fantastically wonderful things happen and sad things happen --both beyond the imagination, always. This past year, at Rosh Hashanah, I never would have guessed I would have the opportunity to live and work in India. And I would not have expected one of Pat's relatives to suffer from congestive heart failure; the relative is recovering, thank God.
What will 5768 bring?
Rosh Hashanah (the Jewish New Year) is Practically Here
This weekend, Pat and I walked barefoot through the Bull Temple and allowed a priest in front of the bull to rub red-powder bindis on our foreheads.
How did this Hindu ritual prepare us for Rosh Hashanah? Until just now, writing here, I hadn't considered a connection. Partaking of any religious ritual, as we did for a few minutes yesterday, seemed better than continuing with no religious community, as we had done for the past two months.
The priest had a plate that held money, which was reminiscent of plate-passing I've witnessed when attending church services with Christian friends. I had US$1 in my pocket and put it on the plate. I was saving the dollar to give to someone poor, which had been my instructions by the person who gave it to me prior to our departure from the States.
The dollar contributor was a past student-intern at our synagogue, who had since become a rabbi. I want to believe that the Temple was not a rich enterprise and that I fulfilled my assignment acceptably.
It's neat how the dollar was in the wallet of a New York City-based rabbi and made its way to the collection-plate of a Hindu priest in Bangalore.
Temples on Land and in My Imagination
The only other major temple near Bangalore is the ISKON Temple. Hare Krishnas, who run it, do proselytize, which is not typical of most Hindus, according to my nephew Zach.
I just looked at the web tour of the ISKON Temple (see link above) and it looks as grand as I imagine the ancient Temple in Jerusalem looked in its day. A number of worshippers need temples, mosques, synagogues and churches. Apparently.
Until planning our upcoming trip to Kochi, Pat and I have been mostly religiously structureless while in India. Yesterday's tour of the Bull Temple and the temple in tribute to Ganesh down the hill from it, and the Muslim wedding we happened on last month, were as close as we've been to spending spiritual time together in community.
Where is God?
My friend Zdravko asked me for my concept of God several months ago and I told him that it aligned with Martin Buber's I-Thou idea, that in our best encounters with other human beings, we see the Divine in each other and are paying full attention to each other, are fully present.
I want to hang onto this concept, particularly while we're not somewhere, where it's simple to pray with other Jews in community. Most of all, this six-month experience of living far from my birthplace is stretching me to try to have I-Thou experiences with people who are not necessarily natively familiar to me.
What Will the New Year Bring?
Every Jewish New Year, I have a parallel sense of hope and dread, as every single year in my experience, fantastically wonderful things happen and sad things happen --both beyond the imagination, always. This past year, at Rosh Hashanah, I never would have guessed I would have the opportunity to live and work in India. And I would not have expected one of Pat's relatives to suffer from congestive heart failure; the relative is recovering, thank God.
What will 5768 bring?
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