The postings on this site are my own and don't necessarily represent IBM's positions, strategies.
...But My Avatar's Performance Lagged Too Much
Tonight, I was invited to a Fancy Dress Ball in Second Life, so that we could test performance on Second Life's Viewer 1 compared with Viewer 2 for work. Pat was at a play with friends and if she had been here, it would have been good for her to join me. Another woman brought her husband.
It felt a little weird to be preparing for a ball at which I'd be with colleagues, but I also recall the '90s and even while in India that there were occasions, where I'd be in dancing situations with colleagues in real-life. They always felt scary and awkward and then turned out to be really fun.
Designing my outfit this afternoon, I felt excited; I could dress ultra-femininely, as I always tend to do in Second Life. In real-life, I'm most reluctant to wear formal-wear. Once, in real-life, for a GLAAD benefit at the Kodak Theater in L.A., I became very tan and wore a gorgeous, coral, formal gown, pointy-toed, but low-heeled shoes and a string of large, fresh-water pearls, but could hardly focus, as I was distracted by my own woman-ness.
Who can relate to that, I wonder? Am I the only woman, or only lesbian, who is unnerved by her own attractive appearance, depending on what she's wearing?
Tonight, in Second Life, I wear diamondy-stiletto platform shoes, a diamond watch and a sleeveless, black gown with subtle lace-work around the neckline and a cutout back. And then my lag is so great shortly after my arrival that I can hardly move. Upon my arrival, the ballroom is set up, so that I have to ascend stairs and I feel like I am making a grand entrance.
I am the first woman there. At the door, the host is lovely, but I am super-nervous. Please don't misread me. I'm not single and I'm not heterosexual. Oh, God. What am I doing here? Me and three other men. In text-chat, I tell the host, "Nice place. I think I'll walk around a bit," and that's when I begin lurching forward and back into the potted plants due to machine-lag.
From my potted-plant vantage point, I see a familiar colleague arrive. Phew, another out lesbian. Oh, no. She's wearing a super formal petticoated gown and it's low-cut. I don't recognize her from other Second Life experiences. I want to stay hidden. My cool black sheathy dress now seems inadequate.
Soon, more avatars arrive and my machine lags just about impossibly. My other openly lesbian friend and colleague arrives as a tuxedo penguin, rather than choosing to appear humanly, stereotypically ultra-feminine or ultra-masculine. She sits down almost right away, rather than dancing or mingling and I am touched at her apparent awkwardness...but maybe I'm just projecting.
She is there to do diagnostic testing and asks me technical questions that my machine won't let me answer. Ultimately, I switch to our company's instant messaging system and tell her that my Second Life performance is impossible and that I feel worse than the prom I didn't get invited to in high school, standing here all alone, since I cannot return to the room where everyone else is; I'm frozen.
"I know. I feel awkward, too," she responds.
"No, I mean, not only do I feel awkward around a bunch of ladies and gentlemen dancing with each other, I am unable to be with them because my machine is stuck."
We agree that I will exit Second Life and try coming back in, but first, I somehow end up back in the ballroom, where my other colleague in the stunning, low-cut dress listens to me kvetch for a bit by text-chat about my machine's performance and finally says, "Oh, well. Would you like to dance?"
Now, I really do feel like I'm at the prom I never went to. And finally, a reward after the suffering. Just like in real-life, something often makes me anxious in a situation where there's dancing and equally often, it turns fun just when I'm despairing and wanting to escape. "Sure."
"Who'll lead?"
"How do we dance here?"
"Just touch the pink ball in front of me."
I touch a pink ball nearby, but it's not the one in front of her, so I'm beginning to dance by myself.
"Oh, I'll come over to you," she says and suddenly we are ballroom-dancing as Celine Dion sings, "Here, there, wherever you are..." and I'm moved, watching the two of us being so beautiful and defiant of social norms, even though in real-life, I'm not a huge Celine Dion fan.
This afternoon, I send my colleague e-mail, letting her know that I'm alienated by the sign in front of the ballroom, which promises a formal, elegant atmosphere, "...where Ladies dance with Gentlemen." I think subversively, I'll wear a tux and come as a gentleman tonight. Ha! But then I create an ultra-feminine outfit, as my need to play with my gender role toward the ultra-feminine end of the continuum wins out.
She doesn't answer the e-mail. I don't know if she has seen my message. But her invitation to dance is the best response of all. We're a graceful, marvelous pair -- thanks to scripted moves, courtesy of Second Life. As our avatars glide along, it's hard not to just stare, mesmerized. Perhaps, she is also more moved than either of us mean to be and chats, "There's a way to dance to a faster song, but it's hard to touch the ball while we're dancing."
"Yeah, I can't reach it either. In any case, thanks for the prom experience I never had."
From across the ballroom, my friend and colleague, who's a guy married to a woman and who has two kids, chats, "Me, too, Sarah." As in, he did not go to his prom either. How helpful. I'm not the only one, making up for, and redeemed from, a sad adolescence.
We whirl and whirl and finally, I feel both self-conscious and ever-so-slightly bored. My dance partner probably feels the same and chats that if I'm getting tired, I can simply click the "Stand" button, which will end the dance.
"How gallant you are," I chat, meaning, I know you want to stop, but you're inviting me to end it. I click on "Stand."
"My pleasure," she says charmingly, as she glides away, petticoat ruffles whooshing onward.
Showing posts with label Second Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Second Life. Show all posts
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Out on a Saturday Night
The postings on this site are my own and don't necessarily represent IBM's positions, strategies or opinions.
...in Second Life
Mitali aka Pat and I went out for the evening with my childhood friend Amarynth aka Amy last night, in Second Life. Mitali was relatively new to the environment, but definitely had just the right spirit. Here she is, with horns and wings, posing by Amarynth's rooftop pool:
[19:10] Amarynth Emmons: what sort of skin would you like?
[19:10] Mitali Wycliffe: Stripes
[19:10] Amarynth Emmons: dark? light? blue? lol
[19:10] Mitali Wycliffe: Blue!
[19:10] Amarynth Emmons: let me see if i have a blue that's transferable
[19:11] Mitali Wycliffe: I should wear shorts so people can see my blue skin.
[19:11] Amarynth Emmons: hehe
[19:11] Amarynth Emmons: actually if your skin is modifiable you can make it blue
[19:11] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: with stripes?
[19:11] Amarynth Emmons: no
[19:12] Mitali Wycliffe: I found a hat.
[19:12] Amarynth Emmons: stripes would have to be part of the skin or done as a tattoo
[19:12] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: charmante
[19:12] Amarynth Emmons: lol
We also took a stroll around the Beyond Space and Time exhibit at the Forbidden City:
[19:44] Mitali Wycliffe: is this IBM?
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: actually, this is not
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: This is the Forbidden City
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: in China
[19:44] Amarynth Emmons: neat!
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: (an exhibit)
[19:44] Mitali Wycliffe: cool
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: that IBM helped with
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: want to walk around?
[19:44] Amarynth Emmons: sure
[19:45] Mitali Wycliffe: hey they bow when you click on them
[19:48] Virtual Forbidden City Calligraphy Kit owned by AM Radio gave you 'Virtual Forbidden City Calligraphy Kit' (http://slurl.com/secondlife/BeyondSpaceAndTime/115/84/25).
...in Second Life
Mitali aka Pat and I went out for the evening with my childhood friend Amarynth aka Amy last night, in Second Life. Mitali was relatively new to the environment, but definitely had just the right spirit. Here she is, with horns and wings, posing by Amarynth's rooftop pool:
[19:10] Amarynth Emmons: what sort of skin would you like?
[19:10] Mitali Wycliffe: Stripes
[19:10] Amarynth Emmons: dark? light? blue? lol
[19:10] Mitali Wycliffe: Blue!
[19:10] Amarynth Emmons: let me see if i have a blue that's transferable
[19:11] Mitali Wycliffe: I should wear shorts so people can see my blue skin.
[19:11] Amarynth Emmons: hehe
[19:11] Amarynth Emmons: actually if your skin is modifiable you can make it blue
[19:11] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: with stripes?
[19:11] Amarynth Emmons: no
[19:12] Mitali Wycliffe: I found a hat.
[19:12] Amarynth Emmons: stripes would have to be part of the skin or done as a tattoo
[19:12] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: charmante
[19:12] Amarynth Emmons: lol
We also took a stroll around the Beyond Space and Time exhibit at the Forbidden City:
[19:44] Mitali Wycliffe: is this IBM?
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: actually, this is not
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: This is the Forbidden City
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: in China
[19:44] Amarynth Emmons: neat!
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: (an exhibit)
[19:44] Mitali Wycliffe: cool
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: that IBM helped with
[19:44] Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven: want to walk around?
[19:44] Amarynth Emmons: sure
[19:45] Mitali Wycliffe: hey they bow when you click on them
[19:48] Virtual Forbidden City Calligraphy Kit owned by AM Radio gave you 'Virtual Forbidden City Calligraphy Kit' (http://slurl.com/secondlife/BeyondSpaceAndTime/115/84/25).
Friday, October 9, 2009
Created My First Art-object...
The postings on this site are my own and don't necessarily represent IBM's positions, strategies or opinions.
...in Second Life
Fairly often, my IBM colleague Robi Brunner hosts a field trip in Second Life for interested IBMers. Today, I was inspired to create my first even remotely artful object.
Happily, my friend and colleague Maria Izabel Vinha Vieira aka Sharon Schmertzin in Second life and I aka Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven in Second Life both were on the field trip together. Maria Izabel lives in Brazil and we have never met in real-life, but we have worked together in Sametime 3D, OpenSim and Second Life.
I took a snapshot of Maria Izabel/Sharon and me, sitting on the shiny, red cylinder that I built (I'm on the left, and we've captured a rare moment, where either of us is sitting still):
In fact, other than Suzy Deffeyes, Mike Ackerbauer, Bernie Michalik and Robi, and my friend Amy from childhood, I've never met any of the friends/colleagues with whom I've been most active in-world. And I feel at least as close to them as to some of the colleagues I see face-to-face routinely, whether or not we work closely together. What does that mean?
Sometimes, I wonder how shy I would feel if I met Chuck or Amy or Maria Izabel or Andy or Karen or Silvia or Thomas in real-life. What would it be like to face a version of Chuck that didn't include skin-covered spikes, coming out of his forehead? How would it be to meet the appealing and graceful Jacqueline's real-life alter-ego, Amy?
For the record, I have neither a pony-tail (the default hairstyle for female avatars in the corporate version of Second Life) nor a Swing Out Sister bob in real-life. And I'm not even sure that any real cat has an elbow, which is the English translation from Yiddish/German for my avatar's first name.
When I asked once, Maria Izabel told me that she dresses artfully in real-life, too, but still, how would I feel if we were witnessing the actual version of each other? Does Silvia really wear elaborate dresses from the 1700s and Indian saris day-to-day? Is Andy as fit in real-life as his virtual version? Probably! How realistic is Karen compared with her avatar? Is Thomas Su as suave as Thom Thom Tigerpaw?
...in Second Life
Fairly often, my IBM colleague Robi Brunner hosts a field trip in Second Life for interested IBMers. Today, I was inspired to create my first even remotely artful object.
Happily, my friend and colleague Maria Izabel Vinha Vieira aka Sharon Schmertzin in Second life and I aka Katzenelenbogen Koolhoven in Second Life both were on the field trip together. Maria Izabel lives in Brazil and we have never met in real-life, but we have worked together in Sametime 3D, OpenSim and Second Life.
I took a snapshot of Maria Izabel/Sharon and me, sitting on the shiny, red cylinder that I built (I'm on the left, and we've captured a rare moment, where either of us is sitting still):
In fact, other than Suzy Deffeyes, Mike Ackerbauer, Bernie Michalik and Robi, and my friend Amy from childhood, I've never met any of the friends/colleagues with whom I've been most active in-world. And I feel at least as close to them as to some of the colleagues I see face-to-face routinely, whether or not we work closely together. What does that mean?
Sometimes, I wonder how shy I would feel if I met Chuck or Amy or Maria Izabel or Andy or Karen or Silvia or Thomas in real-life. What would it be like to face a version of Chuck that didn't include skin-covered spikes, coming out of his forehead? How would it be to meet the appealing and graceful Jacqueline's real-life alter-ego, Amy?
For the record, I have neither a pony-tail (the default hairstyle for female avatars in the corporate version of Second Life) nor a Swing Out Sister bob in real-life. And I'm not even sure that any real cat has an elbow, which is the English translation from Yiddish/German for my avatar's first name.
When I asked once, Maria Izabel told me that she dresses artfully in real-life, too, but still, how would I feel if we were witnessing the actual version of each other? Does Silvia really wear elaborate dresses from the 1700s and Indian saris day-to-day? Is Andy as fit in real-life as his virtual version? Probably! How realistic is Karen compared with her avatar? Is Thomas Su as suave as Thom Thom Tigerpaw?
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Morphing My Research Interests
The postings on this site are my own and don't necessarily represent IBM's positions, strategies or opinions.
A Comparison with Circa 2006
In the fall of 2006, when I first began my part-time Masters in Organization & Leadership with a specialization in Adult Learning and Leadership, I searched among all Columbia University dissertations for key words, trying to imagine a focus for my ultimate, "integrative project" and listed my free association here.
Today, for fun, I looked at the ProQuest PhD dissertations and Masters theses database, which lists all of them worldwide -- not just Columbia's -- and searched for: "'Second Life' and 'Virtual World.'" There were 11 results total, five of which were Masters theses.
My discovery inspired today's tweet, which asked, "What are you doing?" (Twitter didn't exist, as far as I knew, in the fall of 2006, and I had just then been introduced to Second Life, without yet having experienced it):
"Preferring originality, but so far haven't found any formula for creating writing that is both original and popular." In other words, it's cool that my potential topic (see second idea in my previous blog-entry) has not yet had lots written about it, since it's so new, but it might also be too marginal and insufficiently valued as a result.
At work, recently, a colleague reacted to an unrelated proposal, which I considered much less ground-breaking, saying that it was, "...fine, but ahead of its time." I know that my kvetching about this is reminiscent of the job-interviewee, who when you ask him or her for one weakness, responds, "I've been told I'm overly dedicated," i.e, that's not a weakness. In other words, what could possibly be wrong with being innovative, right?
I remember a colleague telling me he was getting his MBA because he had earned a patent for what was essentially web-TV, and yet no one was interested in doing anything with it at the time; "I'm getting the MBA, so that I can learn how to sell my ideas," he said.
A Comparison with Circa 2006
In the fall of 2006, when I first began my part-time Masters in Organization & Leadership with a specialization in Adult Learning and Leadership, I searched among all Columbia University dissertations for key words, trying to imagine a focus for my ultimate, "integrative project" and listed my free association here.
Today, for fun, I looked at the ProQuest PhD dissertations and Masters theses database, which lists all of them worldwide -- not just Columbia's -- and searched for: "'Second Life' and 'Virtual World.'" There were 11 results total, five of which were Masters theses.
My discovery inspired today's tweet, which asked, "What are you doing?" (Twitter didn't exist, as far as I knew, in the fall of 2006, and I had just then been introduced to Second Life, without yet having experienced it):
"Preferring originality, but so far haven't found any formula for creating writing that is both original and popular." In other words, it's cool that my potential topic (see second idea in my previous blog-entry) has not yet had lots written about it, since it's so new, but it might also be too marginal and insufficiently valued as a result.
At work, recently, a colleague reacted to an unrelated proposal, which I considered much less ground-breaking, saying that it was, "...fine, but ahead of its time." I know that my kvetching about this is reminiscent of the job-interviewee, who when you ask him or her for one weakness, responds, "I've been told I'm overly dedicated," i.e, that's not a weakness. In other words, what could possibly be wrong with being innovative, right?
I remember a colleague telling me he was getting his MBA because he had earned a patent for what was essentially web-TV, and yet no one was interested in doing anything with it at the time; "I'm getting the MBA, so that I can learn how to sell my ideas," he said.
Final Project
The postings on this site are my own and don't necessarily represent IBM's positions, strategies or opinions.
...Has an Ominous Tone
A year or so from now, I will be working on my final project for my Masters. True to form, I have a wish to get started early, especially because I'm enrolled in my required Research course this semester, and I'd prefer to do all of the assignments with that particular project in mind.
If I could do whatever I wished, without regard to the usefulness of it to my employer, which has generously funded my Masters, I would likely do something on the value of writing one's life-story as an ultimate vehicle for adult learning...and then trading with another and commenting on his or her life-story -- how the reader relates to it, how it differs from his or hers, how it inspired him or her to revisit his or her own narrative and flesh it out.
To what end? Reflection seems the deepest form of learning of any type I've encountered so far in my Masters pursuit. I mean, I guess I'm thinking that experiential learning is step 1 and reflection on that learning is step 2. If there's no written reflection, then the learning is not as deep. Step 3 would be quasi-collaborative, since there would be life-story exchanges happening.
In a corporate environment, though, which is what I'd need to focus on, probably, most people do not feel safe to reflect as openly as they would if there were no salary attached to their learning and reflection on that learning, and so it's probably not an optimally fruitful path to illuminate.
Of Greater Interest to My Employer Probably
Most likely, my employer would appreciate a multicultural lens/theme for my project, since we're such a global company, and that would be probably ensure greater learning by me, too. Wouldn't I love to travel to various locations around the world to do my research, but that's not likely feasible in terms of time or money, and anyhow, don't I believe in the potential of Virtual World environments? Yes.
Why not do my final project on how to use Second Life to build cultural intelligence? In other words, showing how colleagues from different cultures could meet in Second Life and learn about one another's culture to be more effective in doing business with one another. After all, I've already co-designed and co-facilitated a series of such sessions and all of them do seem to improve the participants' knowledge of one another's culture, according to their anonymous feedback.
Where does language fit in? So far, only colleagues who are fluent in English have been observable by me, as I'm no longer fluent in any other language. How could I test how well it worked for people who were fluent only in their own language? And how could people who did not understand one another's language still communicate with one another, to learn from one another? Could they? Could we add some from of machine-generated translator to our sessions?
What would be the point of proving that cultural intelligence could be increased by participating in Virtual World environments, e.g., Second Life? Besides showing how we could save on airplane travel? How would we ensure that participants felt engaged, rather than alienated? Well, in my experience so far, it's the prospective participants who feel alienated by the concept, until they're in-world, participating, and then mostly, they're wholly-engaged.
People are always talking about the need for "accelerated learning" in these times of explosive growth within emerging markets. Can Virtual Worlds accelerate learning? Is the quality as good as the regular-paced learning? What can Virtual Worlds help people learn that they can't learn as well in other forums?
It's September 6, 2009, and I'm glad that I'm registering some early thoughts on my Final Project in any case. It will be fun to look back at this blog-entry once my project-shape is determined, to see how it differed, how it was similar.
...Has an Ominous Tone
A year or so from now, I will be working on my final project for my Masters. True to form, I have a wish to get started early, especially because I'm enrolled in my required Research course this semester, and I'd prefer to do all of the assignments with that particular project in mind.
If I could do whatever I wished, without regard to the usefulness of it to my employer, which has generously funded my Masters, I would likely do something on the value of writing one's life-story as an ultimate vehicle for adult learning...and then trading with another and commenting on his or her life-story -- how the reader relates to it, how it differs from his or hers, how it inspired him or her to revisit his or her own narrative and flesh it out.
To what end? Reflection seems the deepest form of learning of any type I've encountered so far in my Masters pursuit. I mean, I guess I'm thinking that experiential learning is step 1 and reflection on that learning is step 2. If there's no written reflection, then the learning is not as deep. Step 3 would be quasi-collaborative, since there would be life-story exchanges happening.
In a corporate environment, though, which is what I'd need to focus on, probably, most people do not feel safe to reflect as openly as they would if there were no salary attached to their learning and reflection on that learning, and so it's probably not an optimally fruitful path to illuminate.
Of Greater Interest to My Employer Probably
Most likely, my employer would appreciate a multicultural lens/theme for my project, since we're such a global company, and that would be probably ensure greater learning by me, too. Wouldn't I love to travel to various locations around the world to do my research, but that's not likely feasible in terms of time or money, and anyhow, don't I believe in the potential of Virtual World environments? Yes.
Why not do my final project on how to use Second Life to build cultural intelligence? In other words, showing how colleagues from different cultures could meet in Second Life and learn about one another's culture to be more effective in doing business with one another. After all, I've already co-designed and co-facilitated a series of such sessions and all of them do seem to improve the participants' knowledge of one another's culture, according to their anonymous feedback.
Where does language fit in? So far, only colleagues who are fluent in English have been observable by me, as I'm no longer fluent in any other language. How could I test how well it worked for people who were fluent only in their own language? And how could people who did not understand one another's language still communicate with one another, to learn from one another? Could they? Could we add some from of machine-generated translator to our sessions?
What would be the point of proving that cultural intelligence could be increased by participating in Virtual World environments, e.g., Second Life? Besides showing how we could save on airplane travel? How would we ensure that participants felt engaged, rather than alienated? Well, in my experience so far, it's the prospective participants who feel alienated by the concept, until they're in-world, participating, and then mostly, they're wholly-engaged.
People are always talking about the need for "accelerated learning" in these times of explosive growth within emerging markets. Can Virtual Worlds accelerate learning? Is the quality as good as the regular-paced learning? What can Virtual Worlds help people learn that they can't learn as well in other forums?
It's September 6, 2009, and I'm glad that I'm registering some early thoughts on my Final Project in any case. It will be fun to look back at this blog-entry once my project-shape is determined, to see how it differed, how it was similar.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
My Inadvertent Avatar Harrassment
The postings on this site are my own and don't necessarily represent IBM's positions, strategies or opinions.
That's What They All Say
Really, I did not mean to impose a man's outfit on my colleague, but he arrived at the OpenSim test space at the psychically perfect time, as my other colleague was showing me how to give people a folder full of men's clothing.
There he was, standing across the grassy plaza, looking small and a bit vulnerable.
"What, you don't like my red leggings?" He asked, when I chatted my offer. In this particular OpenSim tool, everyone arrives as female their first time in-world, but his or her real name appears over his or her cartoon-head.
In real-life, I've met this colleague only a few times, as he's from another country, and probably, we have not seen each other since 1997, though we see each other's status in Facebook nearly daily.
"Sarah's having her facilitator final exam and she needs to give away clothing," my colleague typed, tongue-in-cheek, or a similar message, as a way of excusing my intrusiveness....Indeed, she was trying to help me gain that experience at that very moment.
How amazing that I saw my colleague's photo all the time in Facebook, but I got extra-excited when I spotted his avatar moving around in OpenSim because it felt like we were together in the same place, for real, even though his name did not match his appearance at all.
It Goes Both Ways, Whether or Not Intentionally
Very soon, a bunch of big guys in suits, all from his country, materialized by his side, like body-guards, and I felt intimidated. Why isn't he taking the clothing I offered, I wondered. I waited with some frustration while he stood with his back to me as the big, suited avatars began moving around the plaza.
My female colleague and I were the only "real" women in the space and I felt vaguely menaced, and alternately nervous, like we were at a high school dance. Suddenly, I saw my male colleague's body swell up and transform, hulk-like, into a man's body, and when he turned around, he was wearing a men's suit with a Hawaiian shirt. Unlike his colleagues, he'd opted against wearing a tie, which made him look less menacing, but also less accessible than when he was small and a bit chesty. Now, he reminded me of the actor Don Johnson during his "Miami Vice" days.
Didn't I need to get back to work? They started asking my colleague useful questions about the technology that I could have learned from, but suddenly, I felt awkward and shy, and the need to get out of there. Reluctantly and eagerly at once, I typed, "I'm gonna go. Thanks," to my female colleague and clicked "Quit."
Both of Us Were Still Thinking About Our Chance Meeting
Later in the afternoon, I received the following, gentle message from him in e-mail:
Oy, how ironic! Me, who was just training other facilitators this morning via a draft of facilitator notes:
The facilitators of two genders were fine with my advice, and then virtual reality happened later the same day, and I did not rise properly to the occasion myself. It's remarkable, as I've been talking to another colleague for months about the sensitivity around self-expression in Virtual World environments; she has raised my consciousness that some people even prefer to present themselves in-world as an animal, or a robot.
It's true. At a recent, behind-the-firewall event, I saw a little, brightly-striped fish, a short robot and a man with a big, furry tail, among the rest of us, who were more conventional. Most recently, my childhood friend, who's an avid avatar, gave me the gift of some shoes that sparkle brightly, until I type in the chat window, "Bling off." Not too wild, except that I would never wear blinding stilettos in real-life.
Bling On
I responded to my virtually FTM colleague:
That's What They All Say
Really, I did not mean to impose a man's outfit on my colleague, but he arrived at the OpenSim test space at the psychically perfect time, as my other colleague was showing me how to give people a folder full of men's clothing.
There he was, standing across the grassy plaza, looking small and a bit vulnerable.
"What, you don't like my red leggings?" He asked, when I chatted my offer. In this particular OpenSim tool, everyone arrives as female their first time in-world, but his or her real name appears over his or her cartoon-head.
In real-life, I've met this colleague only a few times, as he's from another country, and probably, we have not seen each other since 1997, though we see each other's status in Facebook nearly daily.
"Sarah's having her facilitator final exam and she needs to give away clothing," my colleague typed, tongue-in-cheek, or a similar message, as a way of excusing my intrusiveness....Indeed, she was trying to help me gain that experience at that very moment.
How amazing that I saw my colleague's photo all the time in Facebook, but I got extra-excited when I spotted his avatar moving around in OpenSim because it felt like we were together in the same place, for real, even though his name did not match his appearance at all.
It Goes Both Ways, Whether or Not Intentionally
Very soon, a bunch of big guys in suits, all from his country, materialized by his side, like body-guards, and I felt intimidated. Why isn't he taking the clothing I offered, I wondered. I waited with some frustration while he stood with his back to me as the big, suited avatars began moving around the plaza.
My female colleague and I were the only "real" women in the space and I felt vaguely menaced, and alternately nervous, like we were at a high school dance. Suddenly, I saw my male colleague's body swell up and transform, hulk-like, into a man's body, and when he turned around, he was wearing a men's suit with a Hawaiian shirt. Unlike his colleagues, he'd opted against wearing a tie, which made him look less menacing, but also less accessible than when he was small and a bit chesty. Now, he reminded me of the actor Don Johnson during his "Miami Vice" days.
Didn't I need to get back to work? They started asking my colleague useful questions about the technology that I could have learned from, but suddenly, I felt awkward and shy, and the need to get out of there. Reluctantly and eagerly at once, I typed, "I'm gonna go. Thanks," to my female colleague and clicked "Quit."
Both of Us Were Still Thinking About Our Chance Meeting
Later in the afternoon, I received the following, gentle message from him in e-mail:
Hey Sarah,
Thanks for the help in SL.That was very useful. I am really liking using Sametime 3D for meetings. I hadn't used SL in awhile (The personal ROI wasn't there for me). But with all the tools that are there now, I am much more enthusiastic about it. I can see it being a de facto way of meeting.
I think there will also be some interesting discussion around what constitutes appropriate business dress for these things. I suspect it will be that people will wear roughly what they wear in the real world. On the other hand, if I wanted to change my gender in SL, who is going to say I can't? Instead of business casual we might have gender casual. Or species casual for that matter! :) (e.g., [my colleague's name]? Oh, he's that rooster over there! Lookin' good, [my colleague's name]! :) ) Seriously, it could provide for some interesting discussion. Likewise, the reverse could also occur, where instead of it being more open, it could become more closed if we were meeting people from more conservative parts of the world. (I might not like that, but I could see the potential of it happening).
Talk to you soon, Sarah.
Oy, how ironic! Me, who was just training other facilitators this morning via a draft of facilitator notes:
Note: Men appear as female avatars by default; do not bait them or be too apologetic and rather, just help them change genders matter-of-factly, if they wish to, as in my experience, a number feel unsettled by the experience and we ought not add to their anxiety by joking with them about it; also, if they joke first, and it's not funny, don't laugh along, as we don't want to appear misogynistic to any other participants -- I know how this might sound overly-earnest/too PC, but I appreciate your taking this advice.
The facilitators of two genders were fine with my advice, and then virtual reality happened later the same day, and I did not rise properly to the occasion myself. It's remarkable, as I've been talking to another colleague for months about the sensitivity around self-expression in Virtual World environments; she has raised my consciousness that some people even prefer to present themselves in-world as an animal, or a robot.
It's true. At a recent, behind-the-firewall event, I saw a little, brightly-striped fish, a short robot and a man with a big, furry tail, among the rest of us, who were more conventional. Most recently, my childhood friend, who's an avid avatar, gave me the gift of some shoes that sparkle brightly, until I type in the chat window, "Bling off." Not too wild, except that I would never wear blinding stilettos in real-life.
Bling On
I responded to my virtually FTM colleague:
Yes, yes, yes to all that you said. It was really fun to see you suddenly/psychically in there today. All of the sudden a group of [his native country] guys materialized....
I didn't mean to foist men's clothes on you. Truly, just when you arrived, [my other colleague] was teaching me how to give any man who was anxious about his default gender being female a packet of men's clothing, and voila, there you were! A friend and colleague is actually drafting ideas on how to enable IBM people to express themselves as they see fit in SL/OpenSim behind our firewall, e.g., being whatever gender or species or machine they wish to be.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Teleporting Back to Childhood...
The postings on this site are my own and don't necessarily represent IBM's positions, strategies or opinions.
With a Childhood Friend
The best parts of this snapshot: the amethyst crystals in the background and my friend -- we'll call her by her Second Life name -- Amarynth, who's wearing multi-colored, translucent angel-wings...and my gamer-girl getup; I'm in the foreground. Amarynth is standing next to one of her relatives, who lives far away in real-life.
This snapshot is from after the donkey-ride at the Car Wash sim. When we were kids, we went to fairs with carnival-rides...when we weren't hunting for rocks, playing air-hockey at the arcade in Norwalk or looking at "Tiger Beat" magazine together. It was silly and fun to be sitting in the back of the cart with our grown-up outfits, Amarynth's longer hair, blowing in the breeze as we rode around the odd mall. Here, we're about to enter a carnival ride like none there ever was 30+ years ago.
Amarynth wondered if we could ride in the same bubble. "Let's try," I suggested. I hopped into it and apparently, it was half possible; I got to ride inside it and she sat atop it. It was as close to a psychedelic experience as I've ever had. We tumbled and tumbled through the sky, 1,000 meters, finally landing on the gorgeous property of a very tall woman named Bambitwice.
Bambitwice appeared and asked if she could help us. Amarynth did most of the chatting and I just followed along for whatever the next adventure would be. Bambi told us that she would show us something really neat; we followed her till she took us to an outdoor shore, where she raised her arms in the air and made it start raining. And then she let us experience a tornado -- as part of it. I actually held my breath through a lot of it; that's how real it felt.
Finally, our guide of the surreal ushered us over to the Museum of Illusions she had created, where one of the exhibits offered each of us a free pair of anti-gravity boots. They were just the thing to complete the elegant outfit that Amarynth had generously given to me earlier in our adventure.
With a Childhood Friend
The best parts of this snapshot: the amethyst crystals in the background and my friend -- we'll call her by her Second Life name -- Amarynth, who's wearing multi-colored, translucent angel-wings...and my gamer-girl getup; I'm in the foreground. Amarynth is standing next to one of her relatives, who lives far away in real-life.
This snapshot is from after the donkey-ride at the Car Wash sim. When we were kids, we went to fairs with carnival-rides...when we weren't hunting for rocks, playing air-hockey at the arcade in Norwalk or looking at "Tiger Beat" magazine together. It was silly and fun to be sitting in the back of the cart with our grown-up outfits, Amarynth's longer hair, blowing in the breeze as we rode around the odd mall. Here, we're about to enter a carnival ride like none there ever was 30+ years ago.
Amarynth wondered if we could ride in the same bubble. "Let's try," I suggested. I hopped into it and apparently, it was half possible; I got to ride inside it and she sat atop it. It was as close to a psychedelic experience as I've ever had. We tumbled and tumbled through the sky, 1,000 meters, finally landing on the gorgeous property of a very tall woman named Bambitwice.
Bambitwice appeared and asked if she could help us. Amarynth did most of the chatting and I just followed along for whatever the next adventure would be. Bambi told us that she would show us something really neat; we followed her till she took us to an outdoor shore, where she raised her arms in the air and made it start raining. And then she let us experience a tornado -- as part of it. I actually held my breath through a lot of it; that's how real it felt.
Finally, our guide of the surreal ushered us over to the Museum of Illusions she had created, where one of the exhibits offered each of us a free pair of anti-gravity boots. They were just the thing to complete the elegant outfit that Amarynth had generously given to me earlier in our adventure.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
First Life Interfered
The postings on this site are my own and don't necessarily represent IBM's positions, strategies or opinions.
...with My Second Life
"Uh, I'm sorry, but I've gotta go. There's a big, menacing guy right behind me in Second Life -- a virtual world -- and I've gotta get away from him."
"Um, OK."
"Do you know what an avatar is?"
"Uh, no."
"Well, I'm supposed to meet my friend in Second Life, a virtual world, right now, but she's also got a New Jersey number and I thought it was her, calling, so I hope you'll understand...."
"Uh, sure, I can tell you're unable to talk right now, so I was just calling about [the artists' support group that meets in Montclair on Monday nights]...."
"Yes, let's talk tomorrow 'cause we might not be meeting tomorrow night due to the holiday [Dr. Martin Luther King's birthday] and I'll know by then."
"OK."
"Thanks. I know I didn't make much sense, but I appreciate your understanding. Bye."
So the picture here proves that I got away from the scary person and did find my friend at one of what she tells me are the many, relaxing, beautiful sims (places) available to visit in the Second Life virtual world. We were starting slowly to try to re-kindle a friendship that had lasted from ages eight-14, and which had ended with hurt feelings. We had found each other through Facebook, met once face-to-face, and then agreed, the next time, we'd meet in Second Life, since she was super-experienced, and I was a newish fan.
Hair Was the Chief Motivation
The mission was for us to fix my hair. Already, I had selected a style from the default female choices; it was mullet-y and wholly unattractive. In fact, a colleague had threatened earlier this year not to present with me about virtual worlds at an industry conference unless I improved my appearance. Perhaps I wrote about it here prior, as it took me aback, coming from someone who, in real-life, wears jeans to work -- she's a 3D Internet expert and they get to wear whatever they want to work, and sometimes seem to have a relatively casual aesthetic sense about how they appear in real-life.
Fortunately, she relented, as I opted, instead, to present about the IBM Metaverse, where I have a super-appealing avatar, if I do say so:
But back in Second Life with my friend, I still looked worse than I do in real-life. We were going to change all that this afternoon...until Second Life crashed.
Old Feelings Triggered by a New Social Medium
"When is a less busy time to go in?" I picked up the phone and called my friend to ask her, "I mean, 30 minutes ago, there were somewhere around 70,000 people online, and now, 67,000."
"In the past month or so, I've seen it be pretty steady at around 70,000 people, so I don't know of a less busy time; usually, I'm in on week-nights between 9 and 11 pm and you can try me then."
I was crestfallen; aside from that time-period, typically being my Pat/TV/dinner/reading time before I pass out for the night, I was feeling anxieties like I had had toward the end of our childhood friendship -- whether irrationally or not did not matter. For example:
"Well, I don't want to interrupt you from whomever you're with at that point, so --"
"I'll let you know if I'm busy."
"OK," I tried to sound brave, and we hung up.
Ugh, this was what happened to us as kids. Ultimately, often, there was a friend even more fun than I that she opted to play with.
I did not want to re-live *that* experience.
Ninety minutes later, I tried coming in again and got lucky, until my friend's camera stopped working and so she left and was going to return, and then meantime, I vaporized my own avatar like so:
I logged out and sent a direct message via Twitter to my 3D Internet expert colleague-friend, asking her to remind me how to restore my avatar, since the same thing had happened some months back, and she had helped me then.
Meanwhile, in real-life, I'm hungry for dinner, but I have to include how I love that in minutes, I got a response: "Open Inventory (btnlower rt),at bottom of inventory list, under Library, Find an avatar outfit, and drag/drop on yourself."
Pre-dinner Reflections
A real turkey burger is waiting for me in the oven; Pat's watching football and so I'm on my own with the rest of the meal construction, and:
Just a few more thoughts -- for now -- about Second Life vs. Real-life: My avatar is me, and my friend elicited the exact same insecurities in my avatar as existed in real-life when we stopped being friends at 14...so that's the thing: Second Life is real-life. My avatar has my brain behind it, so no matter what outfit or hair-style I assign my avatar, she'll still be me.
The other thought is a prediction: Just as I spend far too much leisure-time in Facebook today, within a year or two, I'll likely switch to Second Life, and I bet many others will, too, particularly if the servers can handle mashups of Facebook capabilities within SL. So if Facebook could buy Second Life and enrich it with all of the fun things I look for in Facebook -- easy ways to connect with people around the world and to hunt for old friends, along with ample self-expression opportunities, e.g., fascinating and/or funny groups to join and create (and it already has groups), it'll be like what movies are to slideshows; both have their charms, but movies, typically, have become far more popular...and in the movie that is Second Life, we get to be among the movie stars ourselves. We *are* the stars.
Almost a year ago, I was at a conference, where a bunch of social networking execs. vomited on Virtual Worlds, saying, they were all for online gaming, but they felt that today's Virtual Worlds were like "B movies." I think their scorn will continue at their peril.
Second Life, and virtual worlds altogether, are far more intense, with my greater personal investment in the experience than any social networking site I've yet discovered...and I am adventurous with social networking exploration. Certainly, I'm not meaning to be an ingrate about all that Facebook offers -- and I might be trying to earn back fidelity points with my own blog by seeming to denigrate Facebook -- but I really do look forward to a mashed-up version of Facebook and Second Life. I'm sure I'm not the first to say it, and my 3D Internet colleague and friend would likely tell us that convergence is already happening. I can't wait till it's apparent to 3D Internet average citizens like me.
...with My Second Life
"Uh, I'm sorry, but I've gotta go. There's a big, menacing guy right behind me in Second Life -- a virtual world -- and I've gotta get away from him."
"Um, OK."
"Do you know what an avatar is?"
"Uh, no."
"Well, I'm supposed to meet my friend in Second Life, a virtual world, right now, but she's also got a New Jersey number and I thought it was her, calling, so I hope you'll understand...."
"Uh, sure, I can tell you're unable to talk right now, so I was just calling about [the artists' support group that meets in Montclair on Monday nights]...."
"Yes, let's talk tomorrow 'cause we might not be meeting tomorrow night due to the holiday [Dr. Martin Luther King's birthday] and I'll know by then."
"OK."
"Thanks. I know I didn't make much sense, but I appreciate your understanding. Bye."
So the picture here proves that I got away from the scary person and did find my friend at one of what she tells me are the many, relaxing, beautiful sims (places) available to visit in the Second Life virtual world. We were starting slowly to try to re-kindle a friendship that had lasted from ages eight-14, and which had ended with hurt feelings. We had found each other through Facebook, met once face-to-face, and then agreed, the next time, we'd meet in Second Life, since she was super-experienced, and I was a newish fan.
Hair Was the Chief Motivation
The mission was for us to fix my hair. Already, I had selected a style from the default female choices; it was mullet-y and wholly unattractive. In fact, a colleague had threatened earlier this year not to present with me about virtual worlds at an industry conference unless I improved my appearance. Perhaps I wrote about it here prior, as it took me aback, coming from someone who, in real-life, wears jeans to work -- she's a 3D Internet expert and they get to wear whatever they want to work, and sometimes seem to have a relatively casual aesthetic sense about how they appear in real-life.
Fortunately, she relented, as I opted, instead, to present about the IBM Metaverse, where I have a super-appealing avatar, if I do say so:
But back in Second Life with my friend, I still looked worse than I do in real-life. We were going to change all that this afternoon...until Second Life crashed.
Old Feelings Triggered by a New Social Medium
"When is a less busy time to go in?" I picked up the phone and called my friend to ask her, "I mean, 30 minutes ago, there were somewhere around 70,000 people online, and now, 67,000."
"In the past month or so, I've seen it be pretty steady at around 70,000 people, so I don't know of a less busy time; usually, I'm in on week-nights between 9 and 11 pm and you can try me then."
I was crestfallen; aside from that time-period, typically being my Pat/TV/dinner/reading time before I pass out for the night, I was feeling anxieties like I had had toward the end of our childhood friendship -- whether irrationally or not did not matter. For example:
"Well, I don't want to interrupt you from whomever you're with at that point, so --"
"I'll let you know if I'm busy."
"OK," I tried to sound brave, and we hung up.
Ugh, this was what happened to us as kids. Ultimately, often, there was a friend even more fun than I that she opted to play with.
I did not want to re-live *that* experience.
Ninety minutes later, I tried coming in again and got lucky, until my friend's camera stopped working and so she left and was going to return, and then meantime, I vaporized my own avatar like so:
I logged out and sent a direct message via Twitter to my 3D Internet expert colleague-friend, asking her to remind me how to restore my avatar, since the same thing had happened some months back, and she had helped me then.
Meanwhile, in real-life, I'm hungry for dinner, but I have to include how I love that in minutes, I got a response: "Open Inventory (btnlower rt),at bottom of inventory list, under Library, Find an avatar outfit, and drag/drop on yourself."
Pre-dinner Reflections
A real turkey burger is waiting for me in the oven; Pat's watching football and so I'm on my own with the rest of the meal construction, and:
Just a few more thoughts -- for now -- about Second Life vs. Real-life: My avatar is me, and my friend elicited the exact same insecurities in my avatar as existed in real-life when we stopped being friends at 14...so that's the thing: Second Life is real-life. My avatar has my brain behind it, so no matter what outfit or hair-style I assign my avatar, she'll still be me.
The other thought is a prediction: Just as I spend far too much leisure-time in Facebook today, within a year or two, I'll likely switch to Second Life, and I bet many others will, too, particularly if the servers can handle mashups of Facebook capabilities within SL. So if Facebook could buy Second Life and enrich it with all of the fun things I look for in Facebook -- easy ways to connect with people around the world and to hunt for old friends, along with ample self-expression opportunities, e.g., fascinating and/or funny groups to join and create (and it already has groups), it'll be like what movies are to slideshows; both have their charms, but movies, typically, have become far more popular...and in the movie that is Second Life, we get to be among the movie stars ourselves. We *are* the stars.
Almost a year ago, I was at a conference, where a bunch of social networking execs. vomited on Virtual Worlds, saying, they were all for online gaming, but they felt that today's Virtual Worlds were like "B movies." I think their scorn will continue at their peril.
Second Life, and virtual worlds altogether, are far more intense, with my greater personal investment in the experience than any social networking site I've yet discovered...and I am adventurous with social networking exploration. Certainly, I'm not meaning to be an ingrate about all that Facebook offers -- and I might be trying to earn back fidelity points with my own blog by seeming to denigrate Facebook -- but I really do look forward to a mashed-up version of Facebook and Second Life. I'm sure I'm not the first to say it, and my 3D Internet colleague and friend would likely tell us that convergence is already happening. I can't wait till it's apparent to 3D Internet average citizens like me.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Live from Austin...
The postings on this site are my own and don't necessarily represent IBM's positions, strategies or opinions.
Note: I'm totally cheating: I've just cut and pasted this blog-entry from my internal, IBM blog, "Learning for Fun and Profit." I try not to do that too often, but it's only practical this week.
It's the Out & Equal Workplace Summit!
I'm excited to be co-facilitating, "Engaging in Virtual Worlds for Real-world Business Value" with Suzy Deffeyes and Eric Rybczynski later today; Suzy initiated it and I begged to help, since I had experience with an internal case study -- the mentoring pilots we've done in the Metaverse. It was interesting to work with Suzy and Eric, who are marvelously technically-oriented, and to learn from their vast experience with virtual worlds. Suzy, for example, is part of the Digital Convergence EBO [emerging business opportunity] and Eric became interested, in part, due to his deafness, since the early days of Second Life, for instance, were not about VoIP, but rather text-chat, which opened up a new world of people with whom Eric could easily communicate.
Since most of you are not here with us, I think you can be the first to see the charts and speaker notes that'll accompany us. We'll also hand out a tips-and-benefits sheet. [I'll share the tips-and-benefits sheet next week.]
On Friday, I'm psyched to be serving on an inter-company panel that I conceived of and organized, "How to Succeed at International Assignments While Being L, G, B or T [lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender]." Rob Shook, Suzy Deffeyes and I will be representing IBM, and Fauzia Zaman-Malik will represent Accenture, and Cathy Tanelli will represent International Paper. We'll also hand out a tip-sheet at the end of the panel. [Again, next week, I'll share it.] We won't have charts for the panel, other than one with our names and titles on it. We'll have some amazing stories, though, I'm confident.
On Saturday, Frank Jania and I will co-facilitate "Web 2.0, What it is, and What's in it for You." I learned a great deal, working with Frank, and I hope he learned a bit from me, too. I'll wait to post our presentation till we return from Austin, since it doesn't happen till the weekend (if the expected hurricane doesn't interfere). Hands-down, it's the most stylish presentation I've ever co-created -- thanks to Frank's great design sense.
Learn more about the Out & Equal Workplace Summit. I'm hoping that every one of the 13 panels or workshops in which IBMers are either co-facilitating, moderating or serving as panelists will post any charts or tip-sheets they hand out on Cattail [effectively, an internal, web-based team room], as we're doing....
Note: I'm totally cheating: I've just cut and pasted this blog-entry from my internal, IBM blog, "Learning for Fun and Profit." I try not to do that too often, but it's only practical this week.
It's the Out & Equal Workplace Summit!
I'm excited to be co-facilitating, "Engaging in Virtual Worlds for Real-world Business Value" with Suzy Deffeyes and Eric Rybczynski later today; Suzy initiated it and I begged to help, since I had experience with an internal case study -- the mentoring pilots we've done in the Metaverse. It was interesting to work with Suzy and Eric, who are marvelously technically-oriented, and to learn from their vast experience with virtual worlds. Suzy, for example, is part of the Digital Convergence EBO [emerging business opportunity] and Eric became interested, in part, due to his deafness, since the early days of Second Life, for instance, were not about VoIP, but rather text-chat, which opened up a new world of people with whom Eric could easily communicate.
Since most of you are not here with us, I think you can be the first to see the charts and speaker notes that'll accompany us. We'll also hand out a tips-and-benefits sheet. [I'll share the tips-and-benefits sheet next week.]
On Friday, I'm psyched to be serving on an inter-company panel that I conceived of and organized, "How to Succeed at International Assignments While Being L, G, B or T [lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender]." Rob Shook, Suzy Deffeyes and I will be representing IBM, and Fauzia Zaman-Malik will represent Accenture, and Cathy Tanelli will represent International Paper. We'll also hand out a tip-sheet at the end of the panel. [Again, next week, I'll share it.] We won't have charts for the panel, other than one with our names and titles on it. We'll have some amazing stories, though, I'm confident.
On Saturday, Frank Jania and I will co-facilitate "Web 2.0, What it is, and What's in it for You." I learned a great deal, working with Frank, and I hope he learned a bit from me, too. I'll wait to post our presentation till we return from Austin, since it doesn't happen till the weekend (if the expected hurricane doesn't interfere). Hands-down, it's the most stylish presentation I've ever co-created -- thanks to Frank's great design sense.
Learn more about the Out & Equal Workplace Summit. I'm hoping that every one of the 13 panels or workshops in which IBMers are either co-facilitating, moderating or serving as panelists will post any charts or tip-sheets they hand out on Cattail [effectively, an internal, web-based team room], as we're doing....
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